A Case Of The Mondays...

Here it is Saturday and yet another week has gone by without getting a date to travel to Milana's country. To say I am disappointed is an understatement. Each day during the week I wake up and race to the computer in hopes I have an email from my amazing state side coordinator telling me I got my travel date. And each day I am disappointed because no such email is there. I try to stay busy throughout the day (each day) but it can be difficult as I am so pre-occupied with checking my email.

I should feel a sense of relief today because it is the weekend and I don't have to worry about checking my email to see if there is any news on that date - on that beautiful date that will tell me I am welcome to come to Milana's country and meet with the State Dept. of Adoptions and begin the adoption process in Milana's country - on her soil.

Instead of feeling that relief that the weekend is here I feel like I want to pick up the remote and fast forward to Monday or Tuesday or Wednesday or whatever day that email is going to arrive. Then I feel guilty about wishing away precious time that I have here with my girls and my honey who worries when I have a case of the Mondays. (Sorry honey)!!!

I just want my little girl home with us so badly. As each day passes the realization that we will not have Milana home for her birthday becomes more and more of a reality. When I sent my paperwork to Eastern Europe at the end of May we were sure we would have her home for her birthday, but due to circumstances beyond our control that will not happen.

Some days I feel like we will never get there. This has been such an emotional journey. I am looking forward to being at the end of this journey with Milana home. I want to look back at all of this (like I have been told by my sweet friends who have been such an amazing support to me) and be able to say "that wasn't so bad" or "it wasn't really that long of a wait". As I sit here now wanting to hold Milana in my arms and hug her and love her it seems like it is taking forever!

Lemonade anyone?

We had our yard sale on Saturday and did fairly well. Peyton and Riley had a lemonade stand in order to help raise money to bring their little sister Milana home. (They also offered kool-aid). They decided not to ask for a certain amount per cup and did donations only. (This was nice then I didn't have to worry about them having to make change and all that.

This is what their table looked like. They had a jar for donations for the lemonade. There were also Reece's Rainbow pamphlets and business cards.
Here are my little lemonade sellers posing for a picture at their table. They said it was too hot and sunny for them to open their eyes :)

Here is the poster they made for the lemonade stand. They were very proud of their work. I just love the picture of the tall glass of lemonade. They wanted a bigger picture of Milana for the center, but unfortunately our computer that is hooked up to the printer is broke :( It was nice to see people stopping to look at their sign and read the little blurb under Milana's picture.

I am really so proud of these girls for all of their efforts to help raise money to bring their sister home. They are so excited and can't wait for Milana to be here. I think at times they get as anxious to have her home as I am. They REALLY want to go with us to meet her. They are going to be amazing big sisters!!! They surely make this Mommy proud :)

Wouldn't It Be Nice?

I found out yesterday that not only were we submitted, but another family adopting a child from the SAME orphanage as Milana was also submitted. It would be so nice for us to travel at the same time. We are so excited about this possibility. Cass and her husband will be bringing their 6 year old son and we are considering bringing our 8 year old girls. How nice it would be for the kids and the grown ups!

I also found out that another RR Mom is over adopting her son in the same orphanage that Milana is in. I'm not sure how I missed this and am hoping to find a way to reach her so that maybe, just maybe she could get a picture of Milana. We only have the one and it would be so nice to see what she looks like. Maybe they are in the same groupa? That would be so nice! I'd love any information I could get on her.

This is just all so exciting. Heres to hoping we can get a picture and a quick travel date :) Wouldn't it be nice?

Hooray!!!

I got a fabulous email this morning. Our paperwork has been submitted to the SDA!!! I just can't begin to tell you how exciting this is. Please pray we get a travel date soon AND that we travel in early August. I know it is a long shot, but with the girls starting school on Aug. 25 and Chris having year end at work at the end of August that would just be a great time to go. So please pray :)
I am so thrilled we are yet another step closer to getting Milana. We're coming soon sweetie :)

Turkish Toilets - Yuck!!

One of the things that makes me a little nervous about our trip to Eastern Europe is the bathrooms. Apparently they have a lot of what are called Turkish Toilets or Squat Toilets. Pretty nasty right?
We have been contemplating whether or not to take Riley & Peyton with us so that they can meet Milana right away and get to know her. What an amazing experience a trip like this could turn out to be. However, the toilet issue could potentially be problematic. I mean they don't look very user friendly.
So I have been showing the girls pictures of what the toilets could look like and what they may have to use if they have to go - because when you gotta go you gotta go.
So now all that is left is to practice peeing in a small hole in the ground. How else can you make it work if you don't practice?? Guys have it so much easier!
We could always luck out and not have to use the bathroom while out and about....wishful thinking I guess. We'll figure it out one way or the other. Just hope some of the stories I've heard don't happen to us. For example I don't want anyone peeing on my leg. I'm just sayin'.

Dreams, Dreams, and More Dreams...

It seems like I wake up every morning realizing I had dreamt about Milana the night before. Sometimes when I wake up I am sad by what I had dreamt. Other times I can't help but smile.

The other night I dreamt that we got all the way to Eastern Europe and got to Milana and they would not let us adopt her. I remember getting all the way to her orphanage and they wouldn't even let us see her. They told us no and sent us away.

It was such a scary, scary dream and I woke up with tears in my eyes. The thought of getting to her and not being able to take her home and make her my daughter is very frightening. The thought of not getting her at all is frightening. In my mind and in my heart Milana is already my little girl. I guess that is why the waiting is so difficult. I mean who wants to be away from their little girl for such a long time?

Last night I dreamt that I was with her. I'm not sure where it is we were in this dream. I know we weren't in her orphanage, but we weren't home either. In this dream I was getting to do all sort of Mommy things like give her a bath and dress her in new clothes. She kept smiling at me and hugging me. She even told me she loved me. Of course in real life from what little we know of her she only has a few words and they aren't English words. But she told me plain as day in my dream that she loved me. She thanked me for being her Mommy. That may sound silly because she is only 2 (she'll be 3 in September), but dreams aren't always realistic. I just love that I got to hold her and squeeze her and the kisses she kept giving me felt so real. I just love this little girl so much. My little Milana.

Now I am left wondering if she is a little snuggle bunny like she was in my dreams. I just want to hold her and love her.

What To Buy???

It has been so difficult trying to figure out what to buy for Milana. We've gotten her a few things, but we have no clue her size. So it seems each time I go out and buy something I buy a different size. Talk about an interesting mix of sizes. I figure this way at least something will fit her and once she is home we can buy her whatever it is she needs.

We are having the same problem with shoes. I am hoping I can guess well enough so she has at least one pair of shoes that aren't too small when it is time for her to come home. The sandals they have for little ones are just so adorable!

All this shopping makes me want her home more. (Ok...so the wind could blow and I want her home even more). I see all these cute outfits and just can't wait for her to have all sorts of clothes and shoes and toys and whatever it is she needs. Boy will life be different for this little girl once she is home with us. And boy will our lives be different when she comes home too. Hopefully we are just a little bit closer to that reality :)

Wish Me Luck

Yesterday I got some amazing news. It looks like we will be submitted next Thursday 7/15 when the SDA reopens! I can't even begin to tell you just how thrilled I am by this. I never thought the day would come. It seemed to be taking so long. So now I am eagerly awaiting next week and hearing that we have indeed been officially submitted!!

In the meantime it seems I have yet another form to complete. I have been working on getting it for months. You see, although my dossier is complete and in Eastern Europe awaiting submittal there is still one form that needs to be redone. My doctor's medical license. Unfortunately these things have expiration dates and mine will need to be redone so that it doesn't hold things up on account of a stupid little date. (Which by the way is what screwed up that first form I had to redo). I'm hoping it is something I can carry over with me when I go rather than paying the insane amount of money it costs to mail it there.

So...if all goes well in the next week I will be submitted AND have that form completed. It has been tough to get new updated license from my doctor, but I think with the help of some friends I have found a way to get the info I need on my own and can just have the doctor sign it. Yay!!! Can't wait til next Thursday :)

I Want To Go NOW!!!!

I feel like the girl from Willy Wonka who is always telling her father "I want it now!!!!" I want more than anything to get on a plane and go to Milana's country so that Chris and I can start the adoption process in her country. I want more than anything for my dossier to be submitted NOW! I want to get a date for our SDA Appt NOW!!! I want to meet my little girl NOW!!!

I know I can't have those things NOW and that I have to wait. It is just getting more and more difficult to wait as each day passes. I just want my sweet girl - my daughter to be home with our family and that can't happen until I get to Eastern Europe and begin the process there.

Can you tell I'm having a tough time waiting??